Calories, carbs and proteins, Oh my!

Sometimes through out this journey, I wish I had all the answers and knew exactly what to do all the time. But I don’t. Throughout my life I had rode this dieting rollercoaster continuously. And it was a rollercoaster because it was a lot of ups and downs and eventually returned back to the start. I’d get off for awhile and then get back on. I have done a lot of damage to my body. My metabolism is all over the place. So for me it’s a constant battle to figure out what works and what doesn’t.
I am proud of my 50 pounds gone, but honestly thought I would be so much farther. But this is not a rollercoaster this time. Yes it has it’s ups and downs but I am not going back to the beginning or stopping and getting off. This is my life now.
So one of the things I have been playing with lately is upping my calories. I know, people gasp when I say that if they are not living in this world. But things have been off lately. I am working out more, harder work outs, strength training with and without weights. Also cardio. But I find myself with no energy. I feel run down. I was eating around 2100 calories a day (when I kept track). Every app and website I go to tells me I need roughly around 3,000 calories to burn fat. It tells me I need 2400 calories just to live to function. So while that all sounds like a lot, I also want to make sure I am fueling my body. God gave me this body to take care of, to live in and I finally want to give it my best.
I am not going to lie, anything over 2100 calories scares the crap out of me. Like panic attack, can’t breath, stop eating kind of attack. And one thing I know I wasn’t getting enough of is carbs. I just always felt like if I lowered my carbs, even good carbs, I would lose weight. But with all the workouts I am doing (and loving) , I have to have carbs. If I am overworking my body and not putting enough in to sustain it, fuel it, and for my muscles to feed off of, then guess what? It holds onto the fat. Like I said, this is still a scary concept to me but change can ultimately be good.
Oh and just for info. sake, I am slowly upping my calories, maybe a 100 a week or so and also slowly upping my carbs.
So I will keep you all informed on my progress. And as I make these changes, I will be staying away from the scale for awhile. I know at first I will gain some, just because my carbs and water weight, etc.
I am just working on being healthy, losing weight and making this body stronger. We only get one chance at this life here on Earth, and I want it to be a healthy one. I want to do my part.
So while I wish there was a perfect plan, I’m just over here trying to be me, trying to figure it all out, and just trying to figure out what works for me.

Kim